Lola's Comfy Kitchen

Welcome to Lola's Kitchen! (It's really my grandkids' place but they named it for me! I stop in to help out when I can get away from my work.) Come in! Relax and sit down! Are you hungry? Archie! Bring them a drink!

Lola Carly, Hostess & ZIO Agent

Most of the time, Lola's Comfy Kitchen stands on stilts on the banks of the Gold Arrow River in sight of Gold Arrow Station. The Kitchen famously serves the best Talino food in the Zone: a cuisine of rich stews, barbecued meats, seafood, and coconut sweets. After-dinner drinks, or just a good time, can be found on the Gator's View Porch, a peaceful refuge during the day and lively and vibrant at night.

From time to time, Lola Carly summons a gigantic alligator to carry the Kitchen up and down the river for festivals and special occasions. Her family of gnomes (and various adoptees) makes additional profits at celebrations along the water throughout the year. Some say that the alligator, named Kuya Buwaya, is the great spirit of the river itself. When questioned on the matter, Lola Carly just winks and smiles.

An alligator with a tavern and huts on its back.
Kuya Buwaya by Branden L
Lola's Comfy Kitchen

Serving the best food and the coldest drinks in the Zone, Lola's Comfy Kitchen is best known for traveling up and down the Gold Arrow River on the back of a giant gator a few times a year.

Pub / Tavern / Restaurant
Parent Location
Additional Rulers/Owners
Related Plots

Lola Carly Pamplona, Seer of Destiny and Restaurateur by Sin Posadas

Lola's Comfy Kitchen River Cruise With Kuya Buwaya!

Join us as we cruise up and down the Gold Arrow River on the back of our friendly kaiju alligator! Our seasonal cruises sell out early, so make sure you buy your tickets as soon as possible! Events include the Benediction of the Heavenly Council, the autumn leaves of Hartshome Forest, the Shattered Moon Memorial Service, and the Midsummer Flight of the Incarnation Moths.

Bleacher seat packages start at 10 Bilog each!

Lola's Comfy Kitchen Base Map Image
Kuya Buwaya by Chris L

The Building

Lola's Kitchen is a small complex of nipa hut-style buildings. They are constructed from wood and bamboo with thatched nipa (mangrove palm) roofs. The main building contains a large dining area with vaulted ceilings, private dining rooms, the kitchen, and a maintenance room. The thatch-covered Gator's View Porch, is as large as the main building and has the best views of the river. Individual huts for overnight guests line up behind the main building along wooden walkways.

You can smell the food before you see the tavern: meat on the grill, eggrolls frying, and poultry simmering in soy sauce, garlic, vinegar, and black pepper. The thatched grass roof comes into view along with the charming buildings on stilts and the fat gator by the river.

As you get closer, you can hear music and singing from the porch bar. As you climb the bamboo stairs, you are greeted by Lola Carly herself. "Mabuhay! It means both hello and goodbye!"

The Dining Room

The main dining room has vaulted ceilings with floors covered in mats woven from grass. Capiz shell chandeliers float near the ceiling, comfortably lighting 20 tables built from bamboo and hardwoods. The head server, Xalbadora, a great-niece of Carly, leads a crew of six to nine and can take care of up to 150 diners.

The Kitchen's Kitchen

The busy kitchen boasts completely modern magitech equipment run with clockwork precision by Chef Chiffonade, a female kenku with the ability to perfectly copy any meal she has eaten. The large clean space is filled with fresh ingredients from around the world and a multitude of dimensions due to Lola Carly's great influence and deep connections.

Gator's View Porch

The porch lounges on the riverside of the restaurant, offering beautiful views of the river, incoming boats, and the skyship docks. The barkeep Archie, a water genasi, serves frosty tropical drinks while flamboyantly flirting with everyone in sight. At night, the Porch explodes with activity as visitors come to enjoy world-famous bards or to compete in the weekly Karaoke Challenge.

The Nipa Huts

Ten thatched roof nipa huts on stilts trail behind the Kitchen's main building. They are connected by a series of wooden walkways and boardwalks. The rooms come in a variety of sizes and prices suitable for 2 to 6 people. The best suites are the Rajah (king), the Rani (queen), and the Datu (chieftain) suites.

Lola's Comfy Kitchen Menu

Crispy Lumpia - 2cp
Thin fried spring rolls filled with ground pork and mixed local vegetables. Served with sweet chili dipping sauce.

Balut - 1cp
A fertilized duck egg, boiled and served in its shell. Don't eat the black ones!.

Lola's Adobo - 2sp
Fatty abyssal chicken stewed in soy, vinegar, and black peppercorns. Served over white rice.

Carabao Kare Kare - 3sp
Carabao tail braised in peanut butter and annatto sauce. Served over white rice with greens and shrimp paste.

Fish & Shrimp Sinigang - 2sp
A thin soup of Gold Arrow River fish, shrimp, bok choy, and onion flavored with sour tamarind. Served with white rice.

Spit Roasted Lechon - 3sp
Whole thunder boar stuffed with lemongrass, onion, and garlic roasted over fire. 1 portion with white rice and crispy skin.

Gator's View Drinks Menu

Seven Moon Sangria - 7sp
Red wine infused with seven different fruits and liquors. Especially popular with the return of two of the Six Lost Moons. Served in a carved-out pineapple and meant to be drunk by a group.

Nahssea Bain (Natural Light), Valdegond (Keystone), Kapalinda (Spring of Water) - 1cp/mug
Brands of cheap elven beers favored by Entulesse elves on their Cabed Maitulie gap year before entering military service.

Red Feather's Flame - 4sp
A drink on fire and a personal favorite of Archie's to make. A tall glass filled with ice that the skilled mix-o-mancer fills with cognac, simple syrup, and citrus. The display ends with a feather carved from ice and set aflame with magic.

Kuya Buwaya's Swamp Water - 2sp
In honor of the Kitchen's patron gator, gin, green tomato juice, and hot sauce are mixed together with a celery stalk. Served in a barrel-shaped mug.

I prefer to sit quietly watching the crowd. I am fascinated by the different personas that fleshy sophonts present based upon their location. Like any good tavern, the Kitchen stocks a variety of soulforged-friendly victuals. Archie keeps a barrel of sparkling kerosene under the bar just for me!

I never miss Adobo Night or Karaoke Night at the Kitchen! I know I can't sing, but I make up for it with enthusiasm and volume!

Barkeep & Staff

Lola Carly chose the Kitchen's staff from her extended family and trusted friends. Everyone working there takes a magically binding oath to uphold the Laws of Hospitality. As a result, the staff has an ironclad reputation for discretion and competence. Like their grandmother, most of them are friendly brown-skinned gnomes who bustle about efficiently tending to the needs of their guests.

The Kitchen keeps a full crew of servers and kitchen staff, along with a small complement dedicated to the nipa hut hotel rooms.

Archie Araneta - Barkeep

The flamboyant mix-o-mancer Archie Araneta (they/them), an androgynous blue-skinned water genasi, serves drinks featuring magical pyrotechnics and their naturally generated ice sculptures. An incorrigible flirt, Archie has a pick-up line for everyone who comes to the bar but enough professionalism to only use them when they're welcome.

Oh honey, that bit of rough trade doesn't even know who he is yet! You bet I'll have a word for 'im when he's fully cooked!

— Archie the Mix-o-mancer

Archie sports blue skin, sea-foam green hair, and sparkling silver makeup. They famously change their clothes on each of their breaks. They often turn up for their shift in a slim form-fitting tuxedo, switching to a gown with butterfly sleeves after dinnertime, and then finally ending the night in just an open vest and tiny little shorts.

Lola Carly - Hostess

Most nights, when her day shift at the Zone Ident-a-hedron Office ends, Lola Carly makes her way to the Kitchen that bears her name. Although she has no official duties or job title there, she can be found at the host station seating guests, taking orders, bussing tables, adding ingredients in the kitchens, or even just cleaning up in the nipa huts. It doesn't occur to any of the staff or guests to ever get in her way.

Lola Carly never misses Karaoke Night. She and Mr. Shadow love to sing duets together. Their legendary rendition of "The Sun & Moon's Romance" closes the night to thunderous applause.

Mr. Pamplona - Owner/Manager

The smartly dressed Mr. Pamplona oversees all of the Kitchen's operations and has his name on the deed. This middle-aged gnome runs a tight ship and commands the respect of all the employees and guests. He insists on being called Mr. Pamplona during working hours.

He's very good at his job and has an unnatural ability to detect an unhappy customer or troublemaker from across the establishment. He prides himself on his high standards and perfectly groomed goatee. His grandmother, Lola Carly, still uses his childhood nickname, "Chidi", despite his protestations.

Chef Chiffonade - Cook

Lola adopted the kenku Chiffonade off the streets of Garrison City decades ago. Carly was amazed to discover that her new ward could duplicate any of the Garrison's delicious street foods. Chiffy hungrily absorbed every new recipe that Carly showed her, but her kenku nature prevented her from creating new dishes herself.

Lola Carly saw an opportunity and sent Chiffy and her grandson Chidi on a grand tour around the Zone and Sovranty. When the pair of them returned, she bought the Kitchen for them to run.

Of the Ahool the Guano - Maintenance

The grease-stained goblin, Of the Ahool the Guano (or Guano to his friends), keeps the magitech kitchen and the bamboo stilts all in good repair. He's always puttering around, crawling under the floorboards, or using his artificery skills to supercharge the hex crystal appliances.

Staff of Lola's Comfy Kitchen
Staff of Lola's Comfy Kitchen by Chris L - Heroforge

The friendly staff of Lola's Kitchen! Left to right: Chompers the Bouncer, Chef Chiffonade, Lola Carly, Mr. Pamplona the Owner, Head Server Xalbadora, Guano the Maintenance Gobling, Archie the Barkeep

Kuya Buwaya - Alligator

The alligator known as Kuya Buwaya can be found sunning himself between the porch and the river most days. He manifests as an old gator, larger than the other gators but differing only in his extreme laziness and his immense fatness. Townsfolk and fishermen leave him offerings for good fortune with fishing or if they're having marriage issues.

In the evenings, when no one is looking, Kuya Buwaya disappears without a trace. Visitors to the kitchen are told to leave the geckos and lizards crawling in the thatched roof alone. Everyone believes that Kuya Buwaya is one of them and always watching over the Kitchen.

A few times a year, Lola Carly sings to Kuya Buwaya from the porch. The big fat gator lumbers underneath the building and transforms, becoming a gargantuan ghostly version of himself. Kuya Buwaya rises beneath with the main building over his shoulders with the porch on top of his head. The nipa huts and their attendant boardwalks run down the scutes on the giant gator's back. Then Kuya smoothly glides down the river, never disturbing the silverware or the glasses at the bar. He deposits the Kitchen at its new location and turns back into a fat gator, sunning himself on the river's edge.

Kitchen Tales

I come to the Kitchen to unwind after a hard day of hunting down lawbreakers. The good and the bad all come to the Kitchen and some of my best leads come when people have had a few too many drinks.

Tourists come from far and wide to visit Lola's Comfy Kitchen. They come to eat the delicious food, to see the fat gator, or to gain an audience with the famous Lola Carly. Tickets for the Gator Cruises, when Kuya Buwaya swims up and down the Gold Arrow River, sell out years in advance.

The Guests

The Nipa Huts have hosted many famous and powerful people over the years. Everyone from famous singers to powerful wizards come and stay under Lola's protection and under the Laws of Hospitality. The building, the grounds, and Kuya Buwaya himself are warded against conflict. Those who violate the Laws find themselves magically ejected from the Kitchen.

Mr. Shadow

The mysterious Mr. Shadow has paid full price to live in the Datu Hut for several years now. He always wears a hood and is covered in voluminous robes that hide his true form. The staff evades questions about him, saying simply that he is Lola Carly's distinguished guest. Rumors say that he is an exiled prince or a duke of Hell who disagrees with the Accords. Whatever the truth, he stays out of sight and away from everyone else, except on Karaoke Night.

"Oh, Mr. Shadow! He's everyone's favorite singer! He can really hit those low notes!"

The Law of Hospitality

Lola's Kitchen strictly observes the rules between hosts and guests, where all the staff are considered hosts, and all visitors who cross the threshold are considered guests.

The law itself states that hosts and guests shall be gracious and accommodating to each other until they prove by word or action that they are undeserving of such hospitality. This includes violence of word or action and shall be judged by any of the senior staff including Lola Carly, Mr. Pamplona, Archie, Chiffonade, Guano, or Xalbadora.

Those found guilty are banned from Lola's Kitchen for a year and a day and suddenly find themselves ejected from the premises to land in front of an unhappy Kuya Buwaya!

A Night in the Kitchen
A Night in the Kitchen by Chris L - Heroforge

A typical night in the Kitchen! From left to right:

Top row: Detective Lim keeps watch as Lady Aleonera Molndal gives an enchanting performance. Lance Uppercut is ready to party as Two, The Surveyor of Worlds observes the crowd.

Middle row: Archie the Mix-o-mancer and Chompers the Bouncer are on the job as Lola Carly, and Mr. Shadow sing a duet.

Front row: A Tortoise Conclave Soldier and a Zone Authority Police gnome carouse together while an Entulesse Warrior and an Anomalous Forest Ranger relax during their gap year. Xalbadora the Server approaches as Instructor of Recruits and Sgt. Kill Flayer look for a place to sit.

Cover image: by Chris L


Please Login in order to comment!
15 Mar, 2022 21:52

Oh my goodness this was a delightful article. It's a great start for a first draft. I love everything from the delectable menu to the gator moving the tavern on occasion. It was lighthearted and easy to read. I feel there's a lot of heart put into this and felt like I was at home. The staff all sound fun and unique; I think Archie is my favorite lol.

15 Mar, 2022 22:14

Thank you! I'm going to go back through and put in quotes from most of the staff and flesh some things out. Stay tuned!

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15 Mar, 2022 21:59

Great design!
15 Mar, 2022 22:14

Thank you!

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15 Mar, 2022 23:10

This is great! A grand alligator that carries the kitchen, and the menu is quite unique. I would be willing to try the Kuya, swamp water drink. A lot of thought went into this, great job!

~ Eliora Yona ~
15 Mar, 2022 23:36

Thank you! I was trying to think of what a green Bloody Mary would look like!

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15 Mar, 2022 23:34

I love all the various parts here, staff, menu, gator, etc. Great article!   The only thing is that there's little distinguishing between the various sections. They visually stream straight into each other, with the difference between various header sizes hard to spot. Perhaps some horizontal lines or bigger header differences could work there.

15 Mar, 2022 23:37

Thank you! This is just my first draft so I can feel justified hitting the submit button! Pics and formatting to come!

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15 Mar, 2022 23:36

A very enjoyable article. I especially liked the menus. A well deserved Like/Fave from me.   Aemon

16 Mar, 2022 14:00

Thanks! I'm going to go back through the menus to make them a little more "fantasy" but the food items are definitely all real Flipino dishes.

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15 Mar, 2022 23:40

Very creative, very detailed. I like it!

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16 Mar, 2022 14:01

Thanks for the comments!

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16 Mar, 2022 18:42

Oh My this is a great article!, Love the many images that you have and the description of the staff!, and the description of the drinks and food. This article was great to read!

16 Mar, 2022 19:12

Thank you! It was fun to write. I just put in a bunch of my favorite Filipino foods, except for balut!

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16 Mar, 2022 19:09

Mixomancer and a fat gator ... what could possibly go wrong?

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17 Mar, 2022 16:28

Not a thing! As a matter of fact, everything is right!

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Sage SailingOcelot
Sailing Ocelot
16 Mar, 2022 19:11

Loved listening to this article read on Sable's stream! Genuinely seems like a fun and exciting place to visit! I wonder if it would be helpful to have some kind of link to explain about the local currency - is the food expensive or cheap to the customers? I also want to say that the mysterious Mr Shadow seems like a very fascinating character, hah!

~~~~~~~~ SailingOcelot
17 Mar, 2022 16:30

Thank you! It's medium expensive for the world. I tried to show the price range with the cheap beer at 1cp and lumpia being cp. I have a currency in that area called "bilog" that equals 1gp in D&D 5E.

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17 Mar, 2022 17:36

The menu is phenomenal, also the cool drinks ;-)

The world is not enough.
21 Mar, 2022 12:38

Thank you! The drinks are sometimes hot AND cold!

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17 Mar, 2022 18:04

This is incredible! The amount of information I feel is perfect, I feel like I stumbled upon the website to a restaurant in another realm. I am an ablsolute novice world builder, and works like these drive me to improve. Keep up the good work and thank you!   Also, the Alligator moving the Kitchen around is one of the more unique hooks I've seen. Once I read that I had to know what other secrets I would discover.

21 Mar, 2022 12:39

Thank you! I love Kuya Buwaya once that concept got into my head, the article started writing itself.

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17 Mar, 2022 18:47

Amazing work! I particularly like how you organized the space of your article with the css.

Sacha Ricard
Creator of the world Special Agent
Any feedback will be greatly appreciated!
21 Mar, 2022 12:40

Thank you! I'm still making adjustments, stay tuned!

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21 Mar, 2022 13:31

Perfect! I will take a look.

Sacha Ricard
Creator of the world Special Agent
Any feedback will be greatly appreciated!
18 Mar, 2022 13:20

What a well written article, the entire location appears so vibrant ^^

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21 Mar, 2022 12:40

Thank you! I tried hard to make it feel like a real place.

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20 Mar, 2022 17:44

This is absolutely perfect!!! I love it!!! I do not see much Filipino inspired articles and this really intriges me.

21 Mar, 2022 12:46

Thank you! My entire world has diasporic Filipino themes mixed in throughout it. As a Filipino-American I'm really interested in presenting my own experiences through my worldbuilding.

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21 Mar, 2022 01:40

This sounds like a wild place, love the menu and now I want to eat all of that. Really amazing job, you really knocked this one out of the park!

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21 Mar, 2022 12:46

Thank you! A lot of my own favorites on that menu!

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Sage George Sanders
George Sanders
22 Mar, 2022 01:06

I already liked the article but came back to check out layout and editing you had done. It is looking good. The combined Heroforge artwork into scenes are a great idea.

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22 Mar, 2022 01:21

Thanks George! The Heroforge thing is built into the platform if you have the right subscription level!

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25 Mar, 2022 14:37

What a great cast of characters and a lovely, lively place! You did a great job on modeling them all, bringing the place style and atmosphere with every quote and description, and I love how you've done your menu! Excellent! :D

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25 Mar, 2022 15:19

Thanks so much Dani, I really appreciate your kind words! If I could actually go there, I would love to!

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Forgemaster Dimitris
Dimitris Havlidis
28 Mar, 2022 06:31

I saw the map and loved it - reading the article - I am falling for this place - ABSOLUTELY incredible work.

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28 Mar, 2022 13:55

Thank you so much for the kind words! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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31 Mar, 2022 16:52

As always wonderful job kitoypoy. The art, the layout, the work in heroforge... just all of it. Such a fun idea, and well developed on top of that. Kuya Buwaya is also great. Is he one of the geckos, or is he just taking the night off.... who can say, but that one does seem to be eyeballing you, best be on your best behavior

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3 Apr, 2022 12:13

Thank you! And yes, Kuya Buwaya is watching, always watching!

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Sage eccbooks
E. Christopher Clark
2 Apr, 2022 13:52

So much to love here, from "our friendly kaiju alligator" to the cook who can replicate any meal she's ever eaten, and everything in between. Great work!

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3 Apr, 2022 12:14

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I love how the alligator clicked in as I was writing this. I was afraid that my tavern wouldn't have enough personality, but it showed up as I was writing!

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